I have sat down at my computer so many times to try and write a blog. It’s been a lot of typing and a lot of backspacing. Not because I don’t have words. Not because it’s hard. But because it takes time and it takes energy and these days I am learning the importance of stewarding both of those things.
Today is a rainy Saturday that I had a whole lot of ambitions for. I was planning to go grocery shopping and clean among other things. Instead I spent some time writing and reading and finishing a movie all while lying in bed. I’m still lying in bed.
And I feel guilty.
And isn’t that what a lot of us feel when it comes to rest?
This season has been a busy one. With weddings, birthdays and holidays. It’s been busy at work. It’s been a season of wrestling in my own personal life through a few things where I am just trying to do what the Lord is asking me to.
It’s been exhausting and full of life all at the same time.
Something that I’ve noticed about the world in all of the places that I have been, we, as Americans, are always in a hurry and always have a list of things to do that are never ending. We cross one thing off and then add five more. So, what has the Lord been teaching me in this season of busyness?
Be still.
And know.
Today I am fighting to be still. To rest. To recharge.
I am fighting the urge to need to feel productive. I am fighting the shame and lies that tell me I should feel guilty for resting.
In this season the Lord is teaching me all about stewardship. He is teaching me the importance of caring for my body. He is teaching me how to give my firsts of everything that I have, not just money. He is teaching me to manage my time in a way that I am not completely exhausted and spent at the end of every day. He is teaching me to follow through with commitments.
I am learning what it is to get plenty of sleep and to get back into running and eating healthy. I am learning that the more I give the more He gives me back. I am learning that when I manage my time well it feels like I have more of it. I am learning that when I give Him my firsts, He honors it all.
I am learning that it’s okay to take a half day to spend in bed spending time with the Lord and then watching a movie. I am learning that not every day has to be full of 10,000 steps. All while learning that most days need to be full of 10,000 steps and not every day can be a day spent in bed. I am learning balance. I am learning that resting is what helps me to do. It’s what helps me to bring Kingdom to this earth. It what helps me to go to work every day and try my best to lead my squad on the field.
If I have learned anything it’s that my best self is a rested self flowing out of a place of intimacy with the Lord. The more tired I am, the less time that I spend with the Lord turns into me trying to do everything out of my own strength which only brings more and more exhaustion.
So, friends, I pray that today you are okay with the rest but that you also know the importance of the doing that flows out of it. May we continue to fight to steward what we have been given well in this season of busyness, terrible-for-you-but-tastes-so-good food, and too many gifts. I pray that the Lord is first in all that we do.
Also, I am only in need or $300/month to be fully funded for the entire year!! That comes out to equal about $3000 shy of my final deadline of $12,000. Last year we raised it all and I am blown away and would love to keep partnering with all of you this year! Remember, your donations are tax deductible. Hit that donate button if you would like to become a monthly partner or give a one-time donation!
Update on life: I will be heading out to Thailand on December 27th for Gap T’s midpoint debrief!! I cannot wait to get back out to see them and all the ways they have grown in the last 3 months. They will be leaving Guatemala in the next few weeks to start their long travel day to Asia. So, be praying for them as they are wrapping up ministry and saying hard goodbyes to all of the people they have built relationship with over these past 3 months!
Here is a link to a really great worship song in this season: Just click here!
